Over at Althouse, I was going through some comments and stumbled across this playlist of bad songs; veritable crimes against humanity where music is concerned. I, of course, could not resist throwing it into DP like a burlap sack writhing with psychotic rats.
So, for your horror and amusement:
“Afternoon Delight” — by the Starland Vocal Band
“Alone Again (Naturally)” — Gilbert O’Sullivan
“At Seventeen” — Janis Ian
“Brand New Key” — Melanie
“Brandy (You’re A Fine Girl)” — Looking Glass
“The Candy Man” — Sammy Davis, Jr
“Coconut” — Harry Nilsson
“Da Ya Think I’m Sexy?” — Rod Stewart
“Dancing On The Ceiling” — Lionel Richie
“Escape (The Piña Colada Song)” — Rupert Holmes
“Feelings” — Morris Albert
“The Final Countdown” — Europe
“Get Up And Boogie” — Silver Convention
“Honey” — Bobby Goldsboro
“I Am I Said” — Neil Diamond
“I Am Woman” — Helen Reddy
“I Wanna Sex You Up” — Color Me Badd
“I Wear My Sunglasses At Night” — Corey Hart
“Indian Reservation (Cherokee Nation)” — Paul Revere & the Raiders
“The Logical Song” — Supertramp
“Loving You” — Minnie Riperton
“Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds” — William Shatner
“MacArthur Park” — Richard Harris (or Donna Summer)
“Midnight At The Oasis” — Maria Muldaur
“The Morning After” — Maureen McGovern
“Muskrat Love” Captain and Tennille
“The Night Chicago Died” — Paper Lace
“One Tin Soldier (The Legend of Billy Jack)” — Coven
“Playground In My Mind” — Clint Holmes
“Seasons In The Sun” — Terry Jacks
“Shannon” — Henry Gross
“Sometimes When We Touch” — Dan Hill
“Sylvia’s Mother” — Dr. Hook & The Medicine Show
“Think Of Laura” — Christopher Cross
“Total Eclipse of the Heart” — Bonnie Tyler
“Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey” — Paul McCartney
“The Warrior” — Scandal featuring Patti Smyth
“We Built This City” — Starship
“What’s Up” — 4 Non Blondes
“Year of the Cat” — Al Stewart
“You Light Up My Life” — Debby Boone
“(You’re) Having My Baby” — Paul Anka
You’re welcome.
Please feel free to amend the list with your least faves in the comments. Hey, there’s no game today. What else were you gonna do?
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The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins
Jeez… those ARE pretty bad — although I have to admit, after seeing “Mr. & Mrs. Smith”, I’m not too perturbed about “Total Eclipse”, which in terms of its placement was a great bit of irony.
But the rest would definitely be on my Mobius loop of Room 101 songs.
Only bands missing are Air Supply and Styx.
I actually like a bunch of these songs. They aren’t bad in the sense that they are missing a melody, interesting harmony, or other basic song structure. I think these songs end up on these lists because they are too saccharine, silly, contain ridiculous lyrics, the performance is poor (I’m looking at you, Bill Shatner!), or they were held up as worthy of ridicule and it stuck.
I’d be happy to have most of these songs on my iPod.
Okay, a few of those just to keep me on my toes when I do a random shuffle, would go on my iPod. But not many.
I’d add these:
“I’m Too Sexy” by Right Said Fred
“Barbie Girl” by Aqua. I usually throw up in my mouth when I hear it.
And an important note … there exists an excellent rendition of “Feelings” floating around on YT featuring Beaker from the Muppets singing the lead. Highly recommended.
I will not disagree with even one song on the list. They are all bad. I would not miss a single one. I would add the following:
Imagine - John Lennon
Strawberry Fields - The Beatles
Penny Lane - The Beatles
Most everything by the Eagles
Most everything by Fleetwood Mac
Anything by Bob Seeger
Anything by Badfinger
Anything by Steelie Dan
Rolling Stones after Some Girls (except Waiting on a Friend)
Any REM after Green
Any U2 in the last 10 years
Pink Floyd The Wall
Most if not all Bon Jovi
The Pogues
Any Ska
Some Elvis (Sorry to say, The King was an allright guy)
Anything by Prince ( aka %##^^$&$&^&%*& )
One of the reasons I prefer listening to pop music sung in another language over listening to English pop music is that I can’t tell that the lyrics are insipid and repetitive. In fact, when they’re repetitive, it’s a plus, because it’s usually the only time I can identify a phrase in the song.
Of course, it’ll probably be ruined for me if I ever learn the language the song’s written in.
“Midnight At The Oasis” — Maria Muldaur
I hate to admit this, but I always liked this song. I heard it a lot during the spring/summer after it came out, and I always look back fondly on the summers of my youth…
Some of these songs were simply over played. People just got tired of hearing them every half hour.
Steve if you think “Bilbo” is bad..
If I Were A Carpenter
I’m Too Sexy
Don’t Talk Just Kiss
Deeply Dippy
Don’t Worry, Be Happy
Achy Breaky Heart
Macarena
The last three I would advise against actually playing. If you value your sanity.
What? No ABBA?
The list is also missing Madonna. Unless they meant her when they listed Supertramp.
jim English - Gotta protect Fleetwood Mac BEFORE they were ruined by Nicks and Buckingham. Everything done AN (After Nicks) sux, everything before (BN) was great.
To be completely precise, Christine McVie really started the slide. She was good while fronting Chicken Shack but really blew when she moved to FM.
There’s a Thurber joke about that: ‘He’s having his work translated into french because it loses something in the original’
And my contribution to the list:
Kung Fu Fighting by Carl Douglas
Add just about anything sung be The BeeGees, those falsetto Darlings Of Disco - especially “Stayin’ Alive,” one of the relatively few pieces that would not even be improved appreciably if it had been recorded as only an instrumental.
Speaking of bad Disco…Disco Duck
I feel bad for most of youse. I’ve managed to repress most of my childhood and adolescence, so I barely recognize the names of most of the above. Those of you who can remember screeching voices, insipid lyrics, or brain-damaging music videos must be really hurting.
Steve, you know that repressing your thoughts and feelings is bad for you. It’s those kind of things that lead to antisocial behavior. Such as owning firearms, viewing Anime and commenting on right-of-koss websites.
I believe that we all forgot the worst song ever.
WARNING: side effects include projectile vomiting and homicidal rages. View at your own risk.
I didn’t forget the worst song, and that’s not it. At least it has alternate lyrics that’ll get you through it. The worst song is still The Witch Doctor. OOH_EE_OOH_AHH-AHH!
What are you talking about? That’s a great song!
if i don’t like any kind of music or songs i just remove them of my system but it is harsh character to comment bad about composer.