IMHO the mailman gets more exercise delivering it than the average buyer does using it.

A good test before buying is this: sign up for some gym membership for six months and see if you actually haul your butt down there and use their machines. If you do, having one in the home will probably work, because it’s less trouble than schlepping down to the gym. If you continually find excuses not to go to the gym, you’ll probably find excuses not to use a machine at home too.

I also recommend that if you pass that test and decide to buy, don’t buy cheap. Buying used is good if you can find the machine you want, but get something decent quality and that suits your style of exercise. I watched Craigslist for about a year and the elliptical I wanted was being offered used for only about 10-15% less than new. I finally bought a new one when the manufacturer had a 1/3 off sale (which ought to tell you something about the profit margin on these things). So when you buy used, make sure you are getting a used price.

Supplement the machine with other forms of exercise such as walking or biking, especially when the weather is nice. Any machine gets boring, which is one of the reasons the suckers don’t tend to get used. If you set it up where you can watch DVDs or something, you’re a lot more likely to use it. I also do a fair amount of reading during exercise.

The nicest new feature I’ve seen on these machines is the wireless heart rate monitor. You just strap this thing around your chest and the machine reads it somehow. I’m a techie and I still don’t know how it’s done; the strap appears to have no internal power source and is a solid piece of plastic.

Years ago, in a fruitless if warm-hearted effort to make me “healthier,” my wife bought me a rowing machine.

I live in a large upper New York City West End Avenue apartment, lovingly decorated. The rooms are huge. The ceilings are 11 feet.

“Where shall we put this?” I asked.

“In the bedroom.”

Ah, yes. The 15 by 20 foot bedroom, with Baker mahagony furniture, and an oriental white and blue carpert on the floor that cost as much as a car.

“Fine,” said I.

A few days later, she came home, and asked, “Where is the rowing machine?”

“It didn’t work.” I said.

“What do you mean?”

“I sat down in it, rowed for ten minutes, and I never moved a f***ing inch.”

No more was said.

I am 60 years old, 5′ 10″, 160 pounds, and can jump up into the air and touch my toes, legs straight, and come down perfectly vertical. Quick saw me dive for the school swimming team (or not), a long time ago.

Quick saw me dive for the school swimming team (or not), a long time ago.

Yup, and The Hill always had a pretty good swim team. One of our opponents was the Yale Frosh - which usually had an olympian or two to toss into the water. Or so I recall.