So, Air America radio host Randi Rhodes gets attacked by vicious right wing thugs in New York while walking her dog last night. The left side of the interwebs goes nuts and howls for fascist Rethuglican blood!
Except it never happened. Well, the attack by vicious right wing thugs never happened, that is.
Just for kicks, I grabbed a cocktail - a Knob Creek Manhattan on the rocks; no cherry - and headed over to Daily Kos to check out teh crazy. They did not disappoint.
Even after it became clear that Rhodes just fell in an accident (…and thank heavens she’s ok!™), they were still going batshit bonkers with an unhinged rage that made the esteemed Emperor look like a lightweight taking a fall.
I highly recommend rolling through the above comment thread, if only for the entertainment value. Eventually you’ll get to this little gem of a comment:
Things I learned today(17+ / 0-)
(…)
I’ve learned that, when information is sketchy, it’s always best to reach the most alarming conclusion first, just to be safe.
I’ve also learned that, our leaping to the wrong conclusion is their fault anyway, not that there’s anything wrong with it. Because if they hadn’t made things so bad, we wouldn’t be so inclined to, you know, believe the worst.
I’ve learned that, regardless of what the truth and fact of the matter may be, it remains that right-wingers are trying to kill liberals, and so we should all arm ourselves and learn how to shoot (in that order). Even if the laws of our state may forbid it, we should carry concealed weapons because when the fascists come for us, we have to be ready.
Just like they might have come for Randi. Except for the fact that they didn’t. No matter. In the coming fascist state, they will be coming. For YOU.
I’ve learned that because something is remotely plausible, it should be speculated upon to the most extreme degree, especially in the absence of any evidence or confirming information.
And finally, I’ve learned that those most inclined to react in the most hyperventilating way are the least likely to appear later to admit that they may have made a mistake.
Oh, and I’ve learned that some of Air America’s radio people need to get a fucking grip and act responsibly.
There are enough irresponsible assholes polluting the airwaves and the tubes. It’s sad to see how many are apparently sitting on our side.
Yeeshkul!
I don’t know about you, but I take great comfort in knowing that these fools are blazing through the sky, fueled with paranoia until they go into free fall like Wiley E. Coyote. When I see something like this, I just smile, take a sip of my cocktail and think to myself, “Today has been a good day…”
(via: way more sources than I can list here…)
Submit to Stumbled Upon!
I dunno, Bill. That looks like something I might write, if you know what I mean.
Er, sorry, Mojo. I wrote “Bill” out of habit.
Quite alright, Steve. If folks are confusing me with Bill, I must be doing something right…
What I find most hilarious, is that they would think anyone on the right would want to shut up Randi Rhodes!
The more she talks (well I’ve never heard her talk, but have read incredible excerpts) the better it is for the sane among us.
The problem is, my dumb mistake distracts from my main point, which is that I suspect this guy is trolling or satirizing.
The guy is kicking the fuck out of the Kossacks.
It happens. Some sanity remains, even on the left.
That one is by far my favorite.
drob,
that one is good, but I think this one is my fav:
“When we make a mis-statement, we correct it as soon as possible. How many lies from the right are still promulgated as the gospel truth years after they were debunked?”
So, my first thought, reading this late after traveling for 24 hours, is “bet she was drunk or drugged”. Cruise over to Misha’s site for the scoop and update says “She, in fact, fell down and injured her teeth outside of a Midtown Irish bar at around 6 o’clock Sunday evening after downing about fourteen Ketel One Bloody Marys. She was abusive to the barstaff and generally gross, crass, loud, and pretentious.”
OK if I laugh? I’m sorry you hurt yourself Ms. Rhodes, and I hope you recover quickly. I also hope you learn something about the loons you hang out with.
Steve, you can’t begin to write parody that can compare to what you parody. This does not owe from a deficiency in your skills, which are formidable, but from the sheer witless-wattage emitted by the sincere ravings of the hopelessly deluded.
Absolutely a classic - those chants should prove especially helpful.
If the update from Misha’s site is true, then - while we can be sympathetic with Ms. Rhodes’ for her physical injuries - it should probably be pointed out that she has fallen afoul of the same thing as the “Survivors” gent who foolishly tried some idiotic gymnastics recently on an awards show: Actions have consequences, and sometimes the consequences involve nasty tooth damage.
It would also, of course, explain why she apparently made no police report of any sort.
At least, it doesn’t appear that she tried to claim that the dog tripped her…
What it want to know is: Were the words “Kenneth” or “frequency” mentioned?
“What it want to know is: Were the words “Kenneth” or “frequency” mentioned?”
No, but I heard she went down screaming Haliberton.
Abusive to the barstaff? That tells you everything that you need to know about Randi Rhodes. Size 9 ego in a size 3 soul.
Wait a minute. You mean this is true?
This idiot drank herself into a stupor, fell down, smashed her teeth out, and the blogs are calling it a “right wing attack?”
Please tell me SteveF is at work.
As some wandering observer once noted:
I must retire and consider this. This is worse than anything I had previously encountered, or imagined.
Jeeeez. A couple of weeks ago Bill said I was too well-informed to be the age I claim.* Now you tell me I’m not dumb and deluded enough to hang out with the Kossacks.
Herewith, a three-step plan:
1. Stay up late breathing deeply of diaper fumes.
2. Post convincing trolls on DailyKos.
3. Profit!
* Yah, he was trolling. It still made me cry.
Have checked this out now on several blogs. Thank gob for electronic samizdat.
I don’t blame her — I assume she wasn’t the source of the “attack” stories — and anyone who falls down down after a bottle of vodka can only be charged with non -Slaivic descent — but the abuse of the bar staff bothered me a bit.
Don’t bite the hand that feeds, and so on.
Is this a bad thing?
If you hadn’t thought of it first, I would be doing this kind of thing.
There’s probably room for more than one.
How’s this for a plan: You, Warren, and I stage a concerted troll invasion of some whackoblog. With three, we can have a wild conspiracy theorist, a token skeptic, and an independent confirmer. If someone else joins in, we can have an abusive shit-flinger as well. Fun for the entire family!
Speaking as a former professional bartender, I can only say that she would have abused my barstaff the first time around only. The second time she frequented the joint, she would have become violently ill, passed out, and fallen down, possibly injuring herself.
Oh, wait a minute. Was this her first time there?
Snicker.
Hmm, when I was behind the stick, she’d not have gotten all the way through the first attempt! She does strike me as one of those “Whaddya looking at” Nothing. “You calling me nothing?” types though.
As an aside that just rose up from my memory, I ran into one of that type as a customer in bar once. I was wearing a tie and jacket after work. Instead of sayng “nothing” I said, I wasn’t looking. He went on to say, “I bet you’ve never down a day’s work in your life wearing that suit with those lily white hands.”
When I replied “I’m a Teamster, Local 478, do you really think that?” He suddenly got interested in his drink. :-)
Via inside sources and revelation from mystic sources, I have the Truth of what happened: A VRWCer slipped Randi some roofies because he knew that was the only way a hairy backed Rethuglican troglodyte could ride Ms Rhodes. But he backed out at the last minute because, like most uneducated Jaysus-freak Bushitler apologists, he has a perpetually limp dick, and he couldn’t afford Viagra (the Rethuglican’s happy pill) because he gave his last dollar to an Oppress the Women and People of Color rally.
Okay, F, I’m in.
Gollygoshamighty, Steve, thanks a bunch for clearing up the mystery…some folks ’round here were starting to, y’know, veer off into fantasy and all that…
Me, me!! I can be good at that!!
Sounds like it’d be fun, too.
Bravo Steve, bravo.
Has the term “mugging” transformed when I wasn’t looking. This is entirely possible, since I’m pretty much divorced from reality in grad school, and while my apartment is in a low rent neighborhood, it’s one where there’s very little violent crime.
I always understood it to be theft of personal possessions via force or threat of, not random ass beating.
Or is the left just so used to redefining words that it comes naturally to them now. If so, I need to go mug myself a glass of milk.